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  • Writer's pictureStephanie Cooper

Why You're Not Married...because you THINK you deserve a high quality man

Once again the internet doesn't disappoint when it comes to the never ending debate between men and women. It doesn't disappoint when it comes to how men think women should act and how women think men should treat them. The battle of the sexes continues but this time its at an all time high of where we're at a point that no one saw coming...the battle is about to end...but no one is going to win. Why? Because at the rate this is going...both sexes will become EXTINCT.

Why do I say that? Because while men are bashing women for their attitudes and looks..women are bashing men for their looks and incomes. They want a man who will provide and be there for them emotionally..but they don't want to put in that work in order to get that "high quality man". Meaning they don't want to struggle with that man...they don't want to do any relationship work with that man...they want to "be out" or "dump him" whenever he steps out of the box they have created for him. Sound about right? If not let me give you an example. Say a man and woman are living together (unmarried of course). They are splitting bills, but the man suddenly has an income stream problem. The woman is now picking up the slack and paying a higher share of the bills. Then suddenly the man's income stream stops completely and the woman is now paying ALL of the bills. It's only for a little while until that man gets a job. (IF he's a good man right?) So if that man loses his job and needs help...what are you going to do? Are you going to stay or are you going to leave?

I can tell you that a few of the women who responded to this said that they were going to leave because they can "struggle on their own." I myself commented and said that they should try to stay and work it out. But my response was met with laughter and appall to do such a thing. These women weren't trying to do anything to "help" the man out at all simply because he was a man. They said that if a man isn't financially stable they didn't need to stick around and that they needed "providers" and "financial security" and weren't "struggle mules".

I wasn't surprised by these answers. I mean if they were trying to be Proverbs 31 women...they completely missed the mark with their answers.

Whenever I see or hear anyone talking about their relationships on social media...I have to also remember that it's only one perspective that's being shown. It's only one perspective that is being talked about. There's so much context that's being left out in order to fit the person's narrative. That's hard to do sometimes, but whenever I remember to do it, then it's easier to process what's happening. If you really look at would think that the man is a narcissist or just being controlling. When in reality the women is rebelling or wanting to have control and can't. Same goes with a man's perspective. I have to be fair because it happens too with men. This is why were always fighting and at war with each other. Instead of working these issues out with each other... we are going behind each other's backs and badmouthing verses putting in work to actually work it out. So tell me ladies...what about that deserves high quality?

Is it you arguing back and forth until you get your way? Is it you not cooking or cleaning the house? Or is it your attitude and wanting to be "right"? What about your lack of hygiene skills or the fact that you don't want to work out or eat right? These are just a handful of things that most men complain about when it comes to women. I honestly didn't have a rebuttal for them because unfortunately with this generation of women...these men are correct. Yet whenever you bring up these points...women want to deflect and blame the men for lack of accountability instead of fixing the obvious errors. Now don't get me have A LOT going wrong for them too. Their lack of respect, their not wanting to be empathic, their lack of accountability, their womanizing etc etc. I could go on and on with them too. But at the end of the day they aren't high quality either if they had to look in the mirror.

I keep saying that you have to have a mindset change. A change in mindset isn't just for relationships. It's for your whole way of thinking and how you view your life. A mindset change helps free you of what has held you back in regards to problems in your life because you thought differently about them. Unfortunately most folks won't do this because they don't believe that they have to. Let me ask you's that working out for you in regards to your love life?

You weren't expecting that...


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